Greater Expectations

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Someone once said to me, Expect the Unexpected.

It seemed daring at the time so I took it on board.

The only problem was because I expected the Unexpected all the time I wasn’t really surprised when it happened.

It was expected, right?

Life was losing its surprise factor.

I felt heavy as a watermelon.

My counsellor suggested — wait for it — Expect only the Expected.

So I do,

When the Unexpected happens I light up like a lantern

twinkle like a star.

It wasn’t expected, right?

The Perverse Mathematics of Anxiety

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Something niggles you

All week

Like a nail

 

in yr shoe

And you put up with it

That’s what

 

You do.

And then it’s all over

In two minutes

 

Flat

and you wonder

hey! why did I

 

Ever worry that?

But listen up! here’s

the sting:

 

The very thing

You gave no thought

to at all

 

burdens you all week

like an extra ball

in yr pants.

 

Life is brief.

Loosen up. Don’t worry.

Dance

Cake

icake

It simply is not true.

You can’t eat your cake

And have it too.

I tried it once.

It does not work.

Someone always ends up hurt.

 

Take a slice maybe two.

Leave some for others too.

And if the cake

is truly sound.

There should be enough

To go around.

The First

stoness

 

Someone has to be the first.

Someone has to take the first bite

Of the cherry

Be the first cab off the rank.

Someone has to be the early bird

For worms to be taken.

Some has to drop the rock in the pool

To set the ripples going.

Someone has to throw the first stone

For the stoning to begin.

Before I Met Her

indhhh

 

Before I met her

I always laughed at cartoons

alone,

was astonished before paintings & poems

privately;

 

but now I pass the magazine to her,

the one with the crazy cartoons.

Look at this, I say, & she does    and smiles

Span our faces & rumble our bellies

like little laughing Buddhas;

 

Trouble shared is trouble halved,

my mother used to say — but Joy

Works inversely:

It is doubled when spent with another.